Youth vs Embodiment

Youth vs Embodiment

Posted by Jennie Fresa on

My thoughts on youth vs embodiment:

As women we are taught to dread aging.  Like it’s something terrible that happens to us and we must fight and do everything we can to stop it.  We’re conditioned to worry about our appearances, the changes in our bodies and the day that our reflection no longer seems recognizable to who we once were.  

No one really prepared us for this experience.  Accepting these changes hasn’t come easy for me.  There’s no arguing that the transition to becoming older is jarring in many respects. There are many days I look in the mirror and say, “who is that?”.  And, I struggle, like many, with the weight gain and subtle shifts to my face. 

It wasn’t a simple decision to accept myself as I am. It’s been a journey….one I’m still on.   I have spent years in therapy confronting my emotions and childhood trauma, often exploring the deep roots to many of my feelings and behaviors. I will be sharing more on this topic when I launch my new Substack.  Stay tuned.

As I lead up to my 50th birthday this Spring, I decided to approach this next chapter in my life differently, with this thought in mind:  Youth isn’t sexy.  Embodiment is. 

What has surprised me so far is that the process of acceptance caused me to feel more grounded, confident and at peace in my own skin.  So many conversations at my studio are wrapped around how we grapple with the changes in our bodies.  And, as I listen closely to the desperation that many women share– to be skinnier, to minimize wrinkles– I have to ask myself:  Will I still feel beautiful if I decide not to take the pill or get the shot?   Who am I if my youth and attractiveness aren’t my primary attributes anymore?  

As I continue to do the work, I've been noticing a shift and it surprised me.  I don’t feel less sexy.  I feel more.  More grounded.  More true.  More confident.  More willing to be who I am.  I realized that I am actively taking off the mask and stripping away the performance to truly just be. And damn it feels good!

We don’t lose allure when we age.  We lose it when we are stressed, pressured and told that we have to change.  These unrealistic pressures pull us right out of our bodies.  And, being disembodied (and maybe disillusioned) is the real problem.  

I have said it before and I’ll say it again– the beauty industry needs to change.  We can no longer celebrate youth as the standard.  We must continue to show up as we are. I'm happy to see that the tide is turning a bit for middle age.  Ew, even as I write that I think we need to change our wording to wisdom years or something.  Have a suggestion?

So, what I'm coming to terms with is that aging isn’t a loss of beauty.  It’s an evolution of identity (for those who seek it).  It’s time for a Metamorphosis and I’m excited to take you along for the ride and hopefully inspire you to be more grounded and embodied yourself,  to love yourself as you are.  To aim for better health over perfection.

If this resonated, take some time to sit with it today.  I'll be sharing more soon.

Xo, Jennie

Ps.  I'll be away from March 6th--March 15th.  The studio will be closed during this time.  Shipping and local pick up will be on pause resuming on March 15th.

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